All right boys and girls, this is gonna be a real long one. I have a hot pot of coffee on, a full pack of smokes, and a mild hangover. So, this shall be the longest journal entry ever…. So buck up. If you can't get through all of it, I don't blame you.
January has been one of the best, worst, and interesting months I've ever had. A lot of stuff went down, and I'll post a gig-by-gig recap.
New Year's eve was celebrated by yours truly at the Shady Lady in Portland, with Broken Clown doing a big show down there. It was fun, and we partied way into the night. Had a blast. We played the following week at Club Subterra in Portland, and it was a good gig, but it was good to be over.
The following week was the beginning of the “To hell and back” comedy tour with various participants. The gigs were as follows:
01/10/02 Amherst College, Amherst, Mass
Steve Caouette and myself. Lame show. The kids were on college break, and there were 14 people in attendance. It was ok, but I was not thrilled. We went out briefly, but the scene was dead, so we went to sleep early back at the hotel.
01/11/02 The Caribou Inn and Convention center
01/12/02 The Presque Isle Inn and convention center
George Hamm and I traveled up to this gig together in a rent a car, and talked about Vegas, listened to Springsteen, Journey and Jackson Browne. Checked in to the hotel, had a workout at the gym, and steak and scallops for dinner. Ryan Gartley hosted the show, and I had a tough time in the middle there. I've never done all that well in Caribou. Not one of my favorite places. We went to the Chinese restaurant/bar after the show, and Hammy insisted that I match him beer for beer. I tried, and got so incredibly bloated drunk that social skills were out of the question. I woke up with a pounding skull, and met George at the car. It snowed about six inches the night before, and we were without an ice scraper. Me, still trapped in a state of toxicity, decided that an empty crushed can of soda would do the trick. After about twenty minutes of driving and thawing I begin to realize that I have mutilated this brand new rent a car windshield. We both freak out, go to an auto parts store and bought thousand grit sandpaper, and spent the afternoon sanding it out. It worked. The truth is, within the first minute of sanding, I got a bad paper cut and started bleeding all over the place. So actually, Hammy sanded it out while I lost more blood and passed out.
The Presque Isle gig was awesome. 300 people, standing room only. The crowd was mostly Ryan's friends and family, and he went up and killed. I could tell he was nervous, but he aced it like a champ. Way to go Ryan!
He introduced me, and my opening line was “Jesus Christ Gartley, how big is your fucking family?!” I owned them for the next half hour. It was killer. And of course, George smoked 'em out.
So of course, another night of drinking followed that, too. Whoo hoo!
George and I piled into the freshly sanded rent a car, and hoped for a safe and quick journey home. It wasn't meant to be.
We ate in Houlton, and I called Al Klemick, who was returning from Boston. He said; “Look out. Big storm coming.”
Well, it hit us so hard, we knew we were in trouble. It was a complete whiteout. We saw about forty cars off the road, and it took us eight and a half hours to get home. I called the Comedy Connection to say………..”I'm gonna be late!” It was the worst driving I'd been in. George was delirious. 01/15/02 Sunday River ski lodge, ME
Me and George again. Awful weather again. The gig was not supposed to come with a room, but just a few miles into the drive; we decided that they had better give us rooms. I called and made arrangements. We couldn't see ten feet in front of us.
The show was supposed to start at nine o' clock, and we pulled in at 9:30. There were 19 people in the crowd, but they were good. It was actually pretty fun. We met some cool people to hang out with afterwards, and had a good time. We had to share a room, and I was up at 8 due to George's amps on eleven level of snoring. Not a happy camper. 01/16/02 The Midnight Blues Club, Auburn, Maine 3 shows w/Bob Marley
I had a gig scheduled in Nashua, NH, but they cancelled at the last minute. Bob Marley called and saved the day. He had two shows at the new midnight blues club in Auburn, so Al Klemick, Caroline Plummer and myself went down.
The first show was like you'd read about. Caroline hosted, and smoked 'em in the beginning, I went up and torched 'em, and so did Al. Bob went up and as always, smashed it out of the park. Dream gig.
The second show was sold out as well, but there was a table of loud annoying women in front that gave Caroline a hard time. She gave them a great line, shut them up, and brought the show up. I went up, and the women seemed more interested in flirting with me than enjoying a comedy show. I still did well, but they pissed me off. I got off of the stage and yelled at the owner.
“Get those fucking bitches out of here! They're gonna ruin the show!”
I totally snapped. I apologize to anyone I offended, then and now. The management kicked them out, and the show went great afterwards. 01/17/02 Jackies, Madawaska, ME
Awful drive. George, Rob Steen, and myself on this one. Rob is also the booker for most of these shows, as well as a comic and good friend. Comics have a tendency to complain a bit about how far they have to travel to some of these gigs, but Rob is the first one to say, “I'm going with you, and I'm driving!”
You have to applaud that. You can complain all you want, but if the booker is going to share the hell of traveling to the most northern part of the United States, and let alone drive the whole way, then this is the guy you want to work for. Hammy slept most of the way, and I entered tour delirium about a half hour past Caribou.
The gig was pretty good, and Hammy and I had identical sets. Killed in the front, dipped in the middle, and killed at the end. No question we were fatigued. Rob was solid throughout. FAN APPRECIATION NIGHT!
I received an email a couple of months ago from a woman in Canada who had heard I would be up that way soon. She enjoyed what it was I did, and braved the weather and drove an hour and a half to come to the show. I was impressed! That was very cool. Thanks Kym!
Naturally, a northern Maine jaunt cannot be complete without an evening of drunken debauchery, so we fulfilled our commitment. Rough night. 01/18/02 The Spectacular event center, Bangor, ME
This is one of Rob's best rooms. I was psyched for this one, but not for the drive.
I drove the first leg, from Madawaska to Houlton, and nearly fell asleep at the wheel, and turned it over to George, who was still a mess, and nearly killed us. We had our pictures taken at the Madawaska and Caribou signs, which I'll post as soon as they get developed. We had lunch at Bonanza, chicken and shrimp, and an awful salad bar. I'm too much of a food snob to eat this crap.
We got to the Ramada, I checked into my room, turned my phone off, closed the curtains, and went to sleep. I woke up at six, ordered some shrimp scampi room service for dinner, and headed down to the gig.
I was feeling awful, coughing, upset tummy, and there was a sold out show. John Curtin was scheduled to come, but wasn't able to make it in time due to car trouble, and we all had to pull more time. Normally, that's great, but I felt so bad, so it would be tough.
I have to admit that I was a little disappointed in myself for feeling this way, it was my own fault, and I felt unprofessional. I forged ahead, did my set, and all the illness vanished. It went great. Rob and Hammy killed as well. Poor Curtin showed up, and wasn't able to get up on stage. Sorry, John.
Yeah, we partied afterwards. Big surprise. 01/19/02 Calais, ME
We drove off to Calais the next morning, and we were all a bit testy at this point. We arrived at some shithole truckstop, and received what could possibly be the worst service by a waitress that I've ever had. George and I both snapped, and Rob was cautious in choosing his words, 'cuz Hammy was a ticking time bomb. This only made me laugh, to the point of tears. As we pulled into Calais, we passed a trailer park. Hammy said; “Hey there's a trailer park, there must be a Steen gig nearby.”
Rob almost pulled over,we were laughing that hard.
We checked into the room, decided to go to the pool, but there were about fifty kids in there, so we opted for a nap instead. The water in the pool looked like Mello Yello.
Rob and I went to an Italian joint for dinner, had some good chicken parm and equally awful service, and headed back to the gig.
This show was sold out as well, and it turned out great. The crowd was a little loud, but not too bad.
We ventured into Canada for an evening of drinking, and there's a whole other story in itself there. It's posted on the Spank me files under “Save the painforest”.
I barely recall the ride home. It was great to get back to my messy apartment. 01/20/02 The Comedy Connection, Portland, Maine
Something clicked that night. I went up and destroyed the place. Wish I had taped it.
01/24/02 Patrick's Pub, Gilford, NH
01/25/02 Holiday Inn, Concord, NH 8pm
01/25/02 Another show added!! CR Sparks, Bedford, NH 9pm
Three great shows with John David, Bob Lazurus, Pat Napoli, Greg Boggis, Mike Cote, and Todd Andrews. All three were a blast. Friday was like the eighties (when comedy was booming) for me. I did my set in Concord, literally ran out of the room, jumped in my car, raced to Bedford, and got pulled over. The cop sensed my urgency, let me go, and gave me quicker directions! Thanks officer! The Bedford show was awesome!
01/26/02 Scotty's, Newport, ME
Good room, suck gig. The audience was terrible. They refused to laugh unless I said “fuck”. John David killed though. He was awesome. I love that guy. It's impossible not to. Pat Napoli surprised me at the hotel by ripping the shower curtain open when I didn't know they were there. Hope you got a good look, asshole! Just kidding. It was funny. Anything for a laugh.
FAN APPRECIATION NIGHT!
I had met this girl at the Bangor show, Lynn, who found out I would be in Newport. She emailed me to tell me that she'd like to go. So we made dinner arrangements prior to the show, and we met at Scotty's. She had the Chicken Caesar salad, and I had Salmon. It was nice to eat out with a non-comic. (Or a non-male, for that matter!) Thanks for the great company Lynn!
After the show? I went to the Dexter motor lodge, where they had a bar, and I sat there until last call, drinking all the free Coronas the bartenders would give me. Mullets were everywhere.
I experienced career assessment that night. Anyone who is psyched to be a comic and get free drinks at the Dexter motor lodge should probably set their goals a little higher. Yeah, I'm taking that one to heart.
I n retrospect, I had a blast with my friends, and met some great people. What a great time, and thanks to everyone involved. In other news………………….
After Broken Clowns last three shows (in one week) at the Asylum, Shady lady, and the Subterra, I felt a little drained. We arranged to take the following week off from rehearsing. The week after that though, I didn't feel like it either. Thoughts were coming into my head about leaving the band, but I ignored them to focus on the comedy shows.
I'll give you a little history.
I joined Broken Clown in January of 1996, and left three weeks later to join the more established Ku-Da-Tah. Once the clowns were ready with a new drummer, I offered them to open for us at a gig. They obliged, and they blew me away. From that moment on, I fought my way back into that band, and they let me back in 6 months later, after Ku-Da-Tah had split up.
The first couple of years were incredible. We were filling every room in town, and we were the band to watch. It was a great feeling to be in a rocking band, making music with great guys. We were playing out, partying, and just having a blast. I learned a ton about my drumming, and songwriting. There was a ton of growth on all parts. Eventually, we ran into trouble with our bass player, Walt. He was (and still is) a great dude, but we were all on different pages. He left, we brought Ed Porter in, and he fit perfectly. During that downtime, though, things changed a bit. Twitchboy was starting out, and so was Colepitz. They were starting out as we did, real strong, and drawing well.
When Colepitz was in drummer trouble, they called me in to fill in while they looked for a replacement. Broken Clown was still breaking Ed in, and I obliged. I meshed well with Colepitz, and they asked me to become a member. I said yes, and now I was playing in two of the largest drawing bands in town. It was real cool.
When the Clowns were ready to play out with Ed, things had changed. A lot of the attention went to Colepitz and Twitchboy, and we were dinosaurs at this point. Eventually, our great live shows paid off, and things got good again. Colepitz, though, were taking off like a rocket. A lot of great gigs were offered to them, and we enjoyed them all. It was a blast playing to such energetic crowds. Things were different creatively, though.
Colepitz asked me to leave Broken Clown, and though I didn't want too, I saw it as a career move and did as they asked. The next month was tough. Now that I belonged to them, things were different. I didn't care for the way the band did things, and it showed. I had a hard time enjoying myself. Out of the blue, they fired me over the phone. It was one of the worst experiences I had ever gone through. In retrospect, I learned a lot through it, and I'm glad I went through that experience. It made me a hell of a lot tougher, and a hell of a better drummer. I learned a lot about myself after that experience.
Broken Clown were true champions by dropping their egos to the floor and asking me back. I was happy to, but things were a lot different with the Portland music scene.
Colepitz were the toast of the town at this point, and doing some heavy touring. All of the local papers adored Twitchboy, and a new band called 6gig. Broken Clown was nothing short of being forgotten. The most rewarding part of it was the fact that we still drew a ton of devoted friends and fans to all of our shows. I did know in my heart at this point that I had better change some things with my career, because it was at this point I began to realize that it may not happen for us.
I was happy as hell playing with the Clown, we had a common ground in our musical interests, something I'd never had. For most of my life, my peer groups have been a bit tragically hip, and didn't care for music that's older than six months. I prefer albums that I can listen to relentlessly, and five years later, still sound as good. Mark, Jarrod, and Ed, felt the same. Knowing I had to make some changes, and not switching musical situations, I decided to take a stab at stand up comedy. If you're reading this, you already know that is now what I do! It seemed to work out.
At this point, the band grew a bit complacent, but continued to write some amazing songs, and record an even more amazing, still not released album. Our crowds were dwindling, so for a charge, we did a northeast tour, and rocked every last show. That was the last good time I had in that band, and that was last spring.
I'm a real type A personality. When I want something, I tend to go get it, while my mates are a bit more casual. No big deal, but in the back of my head, I think it bugged me a bit. Their actions didn't bug me; it was my lacking to do anything about it that bothered me. I remained in the band, but had given up, and decided to ride it out.
Ed came over the other night to tell me he had given up and quit. I did too.
This is the email I sent to all of you on my list………….entitled “Adios Amigos”
Hey Everybody,
I just figured I'd let everyone on my list know, so everyone on my list knows!
I have left Broken Clown officially............ I know the idea has been kicked around for some time, but now it's done.
Ed came over tonight to tell me he was leaving the band, and I figured it was time for me as well. It's something I've been pondering for quite some time, but have held off due to the love I had of making great music with such great people. It really breaks my heart to think that it's at an end, but I can only look back at such an incredible experiences we all had together, and I only want to see the guys soar in whatever it is they choose to do next. Any one who knows us knows that there are no hard feelings. (We love each other too much!)
I want to thank everyone who made my stay in this band memorable...... I don't regret a thing we did, and it will always be very,very close to my heart. But we all move on to better things, don't we? I hope to, and I wish the same for my compadres.
Thank you so much...........
-Shane
………………………………………………………………………………………………
I wrote it quickly, but I don't think I could have written it better. I will miss those guys, more than you know. A sincere thanks to everybody who sent me positive responses, it really helps me at this tough, confusing time.
So if you've gotten this far in this novel like journal, what's next musically you ask?
I don't know. I hate to think that I'd throw away 16 years of drumming for nothing, but I still don't know what I'll do. I'm at the point where the fire for playing in bars is long, long gone. I love to perform, but I just want it at a bigger level. So, if the big opportunity presents itself, I'm in. But I think it's safe to say that you won't be seeing me drag thousands of dollars of gear into a shithole club to play for six people any time soon. You will see me at some open mic/blues jams though. I'll be happy to sit in anywhere, and I look forward to exploring different styles of music. In the meanwhile, I've got to raise a couple grand to buy a bad ass electronic kit to play at home. Rest assured folks, I won't stop playing.
So, thanks to so many people who helped the band, B.J., Wally, Lenny, Scot, Cheever and Tami, Shawn Jeffery, Sherie Dyer, Laurie Z, Brenda and Jewlee, Jon Wyman, Joe Brien, Andre Salles, Chris Busby, Bennie Green, Rick Dalton, Taylor Stenger, and I'm sure I left out a bunch, sorry if I did.
And most of all, thanks to everybody who supported us, came out and rocked with us, helped us lug stuff, and offer us food or encouragement. It was the best musical experience I've had to date, and I will always cherish the times I had with the band and the fans. Thanks for reading. See you next month. -Shane